On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…
…a constant topic of conversation.
Merry Christmas everyone! Read More
The Archives
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Day 6 – Verbal Finnarrhea
Friday, December 25th, 2009Is This My Future?
Friday, December 18th, 2009I had planned to write a post asking our male readers why men tend to get upset when their bedmates fail to climax by the end of a good roll in the hay – even when they are repeatedly told that the bedmate in question had a VERY good time. But after what happened to me a few nights ago I no longer can. Now, I understand all too well how those men feel. After what happened to me I can clearly see how goal oriented people (like me) would be totally and completely frustrated by putting in their best work and never seeing the fruits of their labour. Read More
7 Steps to Casual Sex
Saturday, December 5th, 2009“Instead of being a time of unusual behavior, Christmas is perhaps the only time in the year when people can obey their natural impulses and express their true sentiments without feeling self-conscious, and perhaps, foolish. Christmas, in short, is about the only chance a man has to be himself.” – Francis C. Farley
Knob Karma
Thursday, November 26th, 2009“As she has planted, so does she harvest; such is the field of karma.” – Sri Guru Granth Sahib
Readers, I am concerned. I am perplexed, worried and even somewhat fraught. I was being self reflective this weekend past - (okay I was hung over and watching reruns of CSI – the Vegas one, not Miami) and I realised that my recent run of luck with male specimens has been less than favourable. Read More
My Greatest Mistake
Tuesday, November 24th, 2009New (Clean) Moon
Monday, November 23rd, 2009“Yeah, kind of. Like these jeans are a few days old, but the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can’t stand the air around me. I don’t know, my personal hygiene – it’s so disgusting! Really it’s just that I have very few clothes that I like and I’m travelling all the time, so I can’t really get any more.” – New Moon‘s Robert Pattinson
Basic Sex Etiquette Vol. 2: Got Soap?
Saturday, November 21st, 2009After hearing about the sad night our lovely English rose was greeted by hunk of knob cheese as she prepared to pleasure a lover, and learning from more than a few men that their habit of conducting a ‘finger smell test’ had saved them from being face down in crotch rot on many occasions, Read More
Video: How to Spot a VSD – Part 1
Wednesday, November 18th, 2009It’s All About Eve…and Jezebel, Delilah and Bathsheba
Wednesday, November 18th, 2009If there is anything that my Judeo-Christian programming upbringing, has taught me, it’s that woman is the root of all evil. Whether we’re talking about Jezebel, Delilah or the grandmamma of them all, Eve, the desire and lust for the fairer sex has led men to commit all manner of atrocities. Read More
A Night to Remember
Wednesday, November 11th, 2009So, I’m at this party, standing by the bar getting myself another drink, when this pretty young chippy comes up to me and asks me if I’m friends with ________. I say yes, she says “cool” and we end up talking the night away. I find out that her name is Shelly, I learn that she’s just finished school, that she’s going out of town next weekend and that when she laughs her perfect breasts perk up ever so slightly.